In this book, Jeffrey Kottler and Jon Carlson turn their well-polished therapy microscopes onto the subjects of lying, falsehood, deceit, and the loss of trust in the counseling room. What do clients lie about and why? When do therapists mislead or withhold information from their clients? What does it all mean? In their exploration of this taboo material, the authors interview and share stories from dozens of their peers from all practice areas and modalities and ranging from neophytes to established master practitioners. Their stories and reflections cast some light on this fascinating topic and will help to start a more honest dialogue about difficult subject matter.
Table of Contents
Kottler, Carlson, What is Truth in Psychotherapy? Kottler, How Well do We Really Know Oue Clients? Carlson, Why I do What I do. Brooks, Treating Traditional Men: From Believer to Skeptic (And Back Again). Oren, Opportunities with a Side of Fries. Grzegorek, Smoke and Mirrors. Rosenthal, When Therapists Lie to Promote Their Own Agendas. Sperry, Duped, Drugged, and Eaten: Working with the Jeffrey Dahmers of the World. Dunham, The Client with Amnesia. O'Hanlon, Credit Denied and Denial. Hoyt, Never Ever - I Love You! Stevens, The Dance of Optimism and Skepticism. Helm, Grateful for the Lessons Learned. Burns, Cheating at Solitaire. Rochlen, What Clients Talk About - and What They Don't. Moore, Saving Private Joe. Dermer, Rita's Rib and a Puzzle Decoded. Ellis, Running out of Gas When You have a Long Way to Go. Vernon, Weighing in with the Truth. Barnett, Learning from Lies at the Therapist's School of Hard Knocks. Duncan, Cut the Crap: Tall Tales and the Value of Lies. Robey, The Terrible, Awful, Unspeakable Secret - and How it Changed Me. Barletta, Seduced by an Act of Omission. Zagelbaum, Too Much of a Good Thing. Eckstein, Managing Conflict Between Two Partners. Bitter, Mistakes Worth Enduring. Knaus, The Man who Tried too Hard to Act Cool. Peluso, I'm Not Easily Fooled. Nezu, Lost in a Quagmire of Agenda. Rabinowitz, Calling Jack's Bluff. Duba, A Puzzle with Missing Pieces. Reicherzer, The Transgender Women in the Pink Wheelchair. Krug, A Veil of Self-Deception. Waller, Clients Telling the Truth as They Know It. Stricker, I Still Wonder What Happened. Asha, In Defense of Naivety. Smith, The One Truth: He Didn't Want to be a Business Major. Fishman, Duped and Recouped. Walsh, Espionage and Orphans: Lies have Deep Truth. Niles, Fiction, Myth, and Illusions of Truth. Kottler, Carlson, What does being Duped Mena in the Practice of Psychotherapy?
Jeffrey A. Kottler, Ph.D., is one of the most prolific authors in the fields of psychology and education, having written 75 books about a wide range of subjects during the past 30 years. Jeffrey is professor of counseling at California State University – Fullerton, USA, and President of the Madhav Ghimire Foundation (www.ghimirefoundation.org) that provides educational scholarships for at-risk children in Nepal
Jon Carlson, Psy.D., Ed.D., is Distinguished Professor of Psychology and Counseling at Governors State University, University Park, Illinois, USA, and a Psychologist with the Wellness Clinic in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin, USA. In addition to serving as the long-time Editor of The Family Journal, Jon is the author of 40 books in the areas of family therapy, marital enrichment, consultation, and Adlerian psychology
"This collection makes fascinating reading, but more importantly provides rich material from which therapists can learn vicariously how to address deception in therapy. As is often the case, by addressing an issue we wish to avoid—here, deception in therapy— we learn. Don’t believe that clients don’t deceive us (as they do with others in their lives) and don’t avoid this book!" – Bruce Wampold, PhD, ABPP, Professor of Counseling Psychology, University of Wisconsin-Madison; Author of The Great Psychotherapy Debate
"Want to discover the truth about deception in therapy? Jeffrey Kottler and Jon Carlson have collected a formable collection of old pros whose compelling prose sheds light on an important, but previously unexplored, subtext that permeates psychotherapy. Don't fool yourself: The roadmap to avoid being duped is contained within." – Jeffrey K. Zeig, PhD, Director, The Milton H. Erickson Foundation
"Kottler and Carlson boldly ask us to examine the many ways a falsehood can be a part of counseling. An entertaining tour de force of sessions filled with lies, con jobs, and outright deception, here we are reminded that clients and therapists are capable of saying anything with or without reason or truth value." – Bradford Keeney, PhD, Hanna Spyker Eminent Scholars Chair, University of Louisiana at Monroe; Author of The Creative Therapist: The Art of Awakening a Session
"Jeffrey Kottler and Jon Carlson suggest that all psychotherapists have been duped at one time or another...Duped serves as a real-life exploration of this deception, with each chapter presenting a case vignette from a practitioner who worked with a client who either lied through omission or explicitly committed a falsehood...Kottler and Carlson deserve recognition for tackling a subject that is taboo; deception in psychotherapy is rarely researched and seldom discussed. Furthermore, they explore the issue in a way that is thought provoking and fascinating to the reader. Duped is a useful tool for psychotherapists and clinicians in the helping professions at all experience levels, as it serves as an engaging yet humbling reminder that we will not always have access to all aspects of our clients' lives. The stories within it are so compelling that we suspect that a lay audience would enjoy this book as well." - Nancy Murdock and Larissa Seay, PsycCRITIQUES