1st Edition

Why Don't I Feel Good Enough? Using Attachment Theory to Find a Solution

By Helen Dent Copyright 2019
    264 Pages 22 B/W Illustrations
    by Routledge

    264 Pages 22 B/W Illustrations
    by Routledge

    Why Don’t I Feel Good Enough? Using Attachment Theory to Find a Solution offers a guide to how early emotional bonds affect our adult relationships and how psychological theory can help us to find the origin and solution to a number of life’s problems.


    Bringing a wealth of therapeutic experience and the latest scientific research, Helen Dent introduces the benefits that understanding attachment theory can bring to all areas of life. You will find this particularly helpful if you struggle with everyday relationships and have difficulties managing your emotions. Using practical guidance, real-life examples and questionnaires to help you locate your own 'attachment style', she provides the tools and guidance to help you move on and develop secure, positive attachments.


    Why Don’t I Feel Good Enough? will be an important guide and resource for psychotherapists, counsellors, clinical psychologists and their clients. It provides a good introduction to attachment theory for professionals in training.


    Part One: Why Don’t I Feel Good?

      1. How Can I Help You?
      2. Feeling Good
      3. Surviving and Thriving - Attachment Theory
      4. How Attachment Styles are Formed
      5. Attachment Styles in Adulthood
      6. Part Two: Taking Action - Mapping My Inner Life

      7. Family History and the Genogram
      8. Working Out My Attachment Style
      9. Putting It All Together – Formulating My Psychological Map
      10. Part Three: Becoming Aware of the Hidden Forces in My Relationships

      11. Romantic Partners
      12. Family and Friends
      13. Colleagues
      14. Other Relationships
      15. Part Four: Feeling Good - Learning to Take Control of My Life

      16. Taking Care of Myself
      17. Managing My Emotions
      18. Managing My Behaviours
      19. Where Can I Get Further Help?
      20. Part Five: Additional Information

      21. Strengths and Limitations of Research Evidence

    Afterword - Eva, Dan, Jas and Zac…

    Further Reading





    List of Figures

    Figure 2.1 Circles of context

    Figure 2.2 Johari Window

    Figure 2.3 Johari Window after Self-Exploration

    Figure 3.1 The Attachment Cycle – Development of Trust & Secure Attachment

    Figure 3.1 Development of Emotional Understanding & Regulation

    Figure 3.1 Development of Shame

    Figure 3.1 Relationship Repair

    Figure 4.1 Secure Attachment Style

    Figure 4.1 Pyramid of Personal Fulfilment

    Figure 4.1 Anxious Attachment Style

    Figure 4.1 Avoidant Attachment Style

    Figure 4.1 Disorganised Attachment Style






    List of Tables

    Table 4.1 Labels Given to Infant and Adult Attachment Styles

    Table 4.2 Bowlby’s Original Classification of Attachment Styles

    Table 5.1 Adult Attachment Behaviours

    Table 14.1 Universal Emotional States

    Table 14.1 Forms of Dissociation

    Table 14.1 Symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress


    List of Exercises

    Exercise 6.1 Assessment Flowchart

    Exercise 6.2 Genogram Symbols

    Exercise 6.1 Eva’s Genogram

    Exercise 6.1 Zac’s Genogram

    Exercise 7.1 Attachment Style Vignettes

    Exercise 7.1 My Attachment Style Questionnaire

    Exercise 7.1 My Attachment Style Questionnaire – Eva

    Exercise 7.1 My Attachment Style Questionnaire – Dan

    Exercise 7.1 My Attachment Style Questionnaire – Jas

    Exercise 7.1 My Attachment Style Questionnaire – Zac

    Exercise 8.1 Five P’s Formulation

    Exercise 8.1 Nine Steps Formulation

    Exercise 8.1 Eva’s Formulation Map

    Exercise 8.1 Dan’s Five P’s Formulation

    Exercise 8.1 Jas’s Formulation Picture

    Exercise 8.1 Zac’s Formulation Story

    Exercise 14.1 Jas’s Record of Emotions

    Exercise 15.1 Self-Imposed Barriers to Change

    Exercise 15.2 ROSE acronym for managing intense emotion

    Exercise 16.1 Subjective Units of Distress for Measuring Progress



    Helen Dent is Emeritus Professor of Clinical and Forensic Psychology at Staffordshire University.