1st Edition

A Practical Resource for Negotiating the World of Friendships and Relationships

By Liz Bates Copyright 2021

    For effective use, this book should be purchased alongside the storybook. Both books can be purchased together as a set, Negotiating the World of Friendships and Relationships: A ‘Cool to be Kind’ Storybook and Practical Resource [9780367537807]

    This is a practical resource for use by teachers, support staff and therapists that contains session ideas for use with children to promote kindness, friendship and self-compassion. It includes detailed lesson plans with extensive guidance and photocopiable activity sheets to support individuals, groups or classes of children aged 7 and upwards.

    This guidebook can be used to:

    • Help children understand the value of kindness, both to themselves and to others
    • Nurture the moral development of children
    • Support children who may be struggling with self-worth and self-kindness

    This guidebook is available to purchase as part of a two-component set, Negotiating the World of Friendships and Relationships: A ‘Cool to be Kind’ Storybook and Practical Resource. It can be used by teachers, support staff and therapists to teach and promote kindness.


    Session 1 Cool

    Session 2 Coco and Kez

    Session 3 Otto and Indra

    Session 4 Ollie and Nina

    Session 5 Ling and Danny

    Session 6 Cool to be Kind

    Self Kindness


    1 – Super-powers

    2 – Feelings

    3 – How might it feel?

    4 – Calm

    5 – My Map of Me

    6 – Thoughts

    7 – Send a Cool to be Kind Message

    8 – Like / Not Like Continuum Cards

    9 – Cool to be Kind Cards

    10 – Kind to Me Cards


    Liz Bates is an independent education consultant. She supports both primary and secondary schools in all aspects of Emotional Health and Wellbeing, including whole school approaches, training staff and delivering talks to parents. Liz is a Protective Behaviours Trainer, a Wellbeing Award Advisor for Optimus and a Schools Engagement Trainer for The Anna Freud Centre.

    "An utterly charming and accessible resource for teachers and young students to grasp the importance of being kind."

    Bruce Hood, Chair of Developmental Psychology in Society, University of Bristol, UK.

    "It has a clear aim of enabling children to work their way through the often confusing and mind-blowing world of friendships and relationships in an age where acceptance and belonging is most important to them. It enables our children to incorporate new information and ideas about friendships and relationships into their existing thought patterns and experiences. With ongoing, daily support from staff, they are able to adapt their thoughts and thus responses, into their daily experiences… Cool to be Kind will be used not only as an intervention but also alongside our PSHE curriculum whole class as needed. As a resource, it upskills staff delivering it and enlightens their perception of what they thought might be happening. By opening dialogue and discussion between child and adult, you can see an increased understanding and empathy through a child’s lens. The aim to create the best version of themselves is only strengthened." 

    Janet Raju, Deputy Headteacher, UK